1-2-3 Magic Stop Behaviors

1-2-3 counting technique is deceptively simple but it works if you follow the No-Talking and No-Emotion Rules.

When a Stop behavior occurs say "That's 1" and hold up 1 finger. When he doesn't stop hold up 2 fingers and say "That's 2."

After a few more seconds you hold up 3 fingers and say "That's 3, take 5." He blew it ; you put him in a time out in his room (one minute for each year of the child's age.)

When the period is over you say nothing about the previous behavior. You remain quiet. If the child does something else, begin counting again.

Behaviors don't have to be the same. Any "offense" can be counted since children should have been explained before hand what behaviors are unacceptable. After awhile you will have control of the child after counting to 1 or 2.

If the behavior is so bad that it would be ridiculous to count 1, go straight to 3 and add more time for the seriousness of the offense (like hitting a parent).

Time between counts should be enough so the kid can shape up (about 3-5 seconds).

20 or 30 minute rule-the three counts should not exceed 20-30 minutes in total time so that parents don't lose their effectiveness with children forgetting.

When you use the bedroom as a time out space it does not have to be a sterile environment but three things are forbidden: the telephone, friends and TV/Nintendo and computer games.

When children say they don't care if they go to their room then that usually means they do care. The power is in the interruption of the child's activities.